So let’s get in this bitch (By the way I’m writing this on my new iMac..my keyboard is small..my hands are big..I’m struggling like a muthafucka)
All your life you may have been told to always tell the truth…Like if you don’t tell the truth some freaking monster will come out and fuck your whole shit up…Well that may be true in terms of the effect it may have on you mentally that you may call it a monster…I’ve lied once to my mom and she knew the monster was there…and she let me keep lying until I got caught up and knew I was either going to get someone else in trouble and really embarrass myself…But I’m 22 years old…I’ve lived long enough to know that there are times when you are going to have to lie…And I want to discuss them…
Remember when you were young…and supposedly there was a big fat white guy with a beard, riding on reindeer to deliver presents to your bad ass? Well that was Santa Claus…that’s the first lie…A dude coming down a chimney and knowing exactly what you wanted was a little hard to believe when I was young. I knew who got them presents for me..No mistake…But what about the millions and millions of kids, toddlers who think there is someone else giving them presents…especially when you are told to never take things from strangers yet you were not reluctant to take these gifts…fuck outta here…My kids won’t believe in Santa Claus…And the reason being is that I want them to know I worked hard for those presents..haha…Also put the tooth fairy and the Easter bunny under the same category…I actually believed in the Tooth Fairy until I caught my mom red handed, putting some money under the pillow..I was fucking pissed but whatever..haha...So maybe I’ll have to lie for my children to enjoy their childhood…Aite you got me there…
The next one I’ll discuss is something that you may have done as a student in college or high school. I have been known to mess around and not read the syllabus for a paper, project, whatever it may be…Or I just had the best weekend of my life and didn’t do any work and now the game is on, or the show is on…and work is not what I’m trying to do…You go to class and end up not handing in the paper but you’re ready to tell a lie about why you couldn’t get it done...this is a break of trust but it must be pulled off with ease…No smiling, be sincere, never mention family (Only for extreme measures) and just give the reason..A friend was hurt, family emergency, dog died, whatever it may be…And this gives you sympathy time…Trust me…there’s no teacher that’s going to say “Oh well you had a fair amount to complete it” That’s when you hit the crocodile tears or get really upset…You might have to go extreme measures like “I suffered a concussion while helping an old lady cross the street…I don’t even know if she got to the other side safely!!!” Make a scene, disappear, don’t come into the next class and teachers will have to know you’re not kidding…That’s a good time to lie right?
The last one is a situation that may leave you walking on thin ice…Say you’re into someone, yall start talking, shit is good…sharing shit, going out on dates, enjoying each other’s company and all that…Then that person asks a question that might ruin everything if you give her the most truthful answer…This is when you are allowed to lie…I don’t condone it, but if you have to go to extreme measures then pull it out…Basically she may ask you “What do you usually do on the weekend?” Very simple…college football on deck, get fucked up with the fellas, fuck around, and get in where you fit in..haha…But there’s no way you’re saying that to a potential, mature wifey….You second guess that bitch and say “I’m very open to a lot of things, museums, art exhibitions, jamming to some Maxwell, sipping on wine, and watching a movie late at night” Sounds weak right…well it’s not weak but what he did right there was peep that Facebook profile and saw what she liked to do..He mentioned 6 of the 12 things she had on there…haha…She remembers that list and loves it…Now let’s fast forward to like 4 months in…Art exhibition versus the college football matchup of the season #1 versus #2...In your sweatpants not trying to go anywhere…But you promised your girl you would go…Basically you let her know “Hey baby, come here (kiss her) remember when we met, you asked me what I like to do on the weekends? Well I looked at your Facebook and reiterated some of those things..haha..wasn’t that cute of me (kiss her again)” Freeze fame…you’re fucked dude…Like dog house for a long fucking time…But at least you got the girl!!!
So I provided three of the “When To Lie” moments so let me know what you got for me…Any more moments when it’s necessary to lie? Should one always tell the truth and be as honest as Abe? (Lincoln wassup)
Mr. Hudson-White Lies (Album is great..this song fits)
2 comments:
You can't always be honest with people. There's a difference between being nice and being deceitful though. Intent counts for something.
Manny said it all. I completely agree with the philosophy that intention is everything. If you're lying just to get one over on someone, to convince them you're someone you're not, get an unfair advantage,etc... then that's grimy. On the flip side if you're lying to spare someone's feelings, save a life, etc then the gray area comes up.
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